Non-New-Years-Resolutions for 2012

I think New Year’s resolutions should be achievable. In that spirit, here are ten things I definitely will not do in 2012:

1. Read one single more self-help book.
2. Consult any more healers.
3. “Get out more.”
4. Get up earlier.
5. Get better about talking on the phone.
6. Engage with passionate yogis in earnest conversations about the difference between “compassion” and “simply not having a sense of humor.”
7. Swear I’m gonna learn to walk in heels for the third year in a row.
8. Continue trying to popularize “pajama chic” on my daily jaunts to The Hole.
9. Explain to one single more vegan why I eat meat.
10. Prepare for a zombie invasion (sorry, Maynard).

And, a bonus list! Thanks to The Hairpin for this idea. This is my “reverse bucket list,” or, ten things I definitely do NOT want to do before I die:

1. Go to Burning Man.
2. Complete a triathlon.
3. Sojourn through India on a spiritual quest.
4. Get a boob job.
5. Get elected to office.
6. Shoot a gun.
7. Finally learn to sew.
8. Spend a little time in prison, just for the experience.
9. Be the life of a party.
10. Have a 3-way.

This is by no means a comprehensive list.

Oh, here’s one thing I will be doing, at least in January:

The River of Stones 30-Day Writing Challenge. Join me?