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The Crazymaker… Archetype

June 2nd, 2017

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I am really not a self-help kinda girl… except when I am. One of my favorite books of all time is The Artist’s Way. It’s a book, but it’s also a creative program that involves journaling, taking yourself on “artist dates,” and doing other fun self-indulgent things to draw out your stifled creative side. The last time I “did” the Artist’s Way was in 2010, and I blogged about it, of course. (If you’re curious, the last entry is here, and you can page backward.)

One of the big elements of the Artist’s Way involves excommunicating crazymakers from your life. Crazymakers are those people hell bent on derailing your day in any way they can. You know the type. They are so interesting, and add so much color to your life—and so much stress. This description is apt: 

Crazymakers create storm centers. Crazymakers like drama. If they can swing it, they are the star. Everyone around them functions as a supportive cast, picking up their cues, their entrances and their exits, from the crazymaker’s (crazy) whims. The crazymaking dynamic is grounded in power, and so any group of people can function as an energy system to be exploited and drained. 

(Thank you freepeople.com)

The crazymaker is the one who, when you are in the middle of one of the most stressful weeks of your life, trying to move cross-country with feisty toddlers and all of the hoopla that entails, calls and insists that she needs to talk to you about her teenager right now because the timing is convenient for her. Never mind that you’re currently trying to take care of something important of your own that’s time-sensitive, while entertaining a fussy 2-year-old, who really needs some lunch, at someone else’s house.

The crazymaker is the one who derails the very good adoption plan you arranged for your one semi-feral cat who can’t be relocated across the country, decides she’s “probably” going to adopt him instead (but won’t commit 100%), then changes her mind at the last minute—once your other plan is no longer an option—and randomly drops him back off at your house at 7pm in the middle of your kids’ hectic bedtime.

She’s also the one who, although she has known your moving date for like, years, literally, conveniently arranges to vacation during the time period where the house deal she orchestrated is supposed to close, leaving you wondering if she’s actually buying the house at all. And then threatens not to buy the house if you don’t come up with a Plan B, quick, for the cat she just dropped off with little warning four days before your move. But won’t let you sell the house to anyone else, either. 

These are just hypothetical examples, of course. Not something I am currently dealing with. Ahem. The point is, we all have one of these people in our lives. 

Recently I went back and reread these “11 Signs you are dealing with a Crazymaker” to brush up on my crazymaker corralling. I was amused to read this description: 

  1. Crazymakers break deals and destroy schedules.
  2. Crazymakers expect special treatment.
  3. Crazymakers discount your reality.
  4. Crazymakers spend your time and money.
  5. Crazymakers triangulate those they deal with.
  6. Crazymakers are expert blamers.
  7. Crazymakers create dramas-but seldom where they belong.
  8. Crazymakers hate schedules- except their own.
  9. Crazymakers hate order.
  10. Crazymakers deny that they are Crazymakers.
  11. Crazymakers drive you Crazy.

(Thank you again freepeople.com)

Check, check, check, check, and check.

You can learn a lot about yourself from crazymakers. On the one hand, you can learn what your breaking point is. But it’s also good practice for staying in your center. I am not great at this, but I am grateful for the opportunity to constantly brush up on my skills.

 

 

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